Date: October 25, 2009 12:18 am Title: Watch Dog
Ooh, a "Look Out" sequel! What's the other sequel called? (Want to read that too.) :)
Wow, I am so blown away by your opening images/ descriptions of this flame-like light cutting through this curtained room; I love that even the muted blue screen of the TV is no match for this light. You've set such a beautiful tone and foreshadowing for what a light such as this will do, not only to the stationary objects and the room, but to its occupants. *gets chills*
Wow, again, to have Shawn pressed in shadow against the protective cover of the apartment wall which is striking, for two reasons: set up to suggest this safe house wall is some kind of "bulletproof" or "hurt proof" or "death proof", and yet, Shawn, while staring at the outside world, exudes this kind of despair and longing for escape— in his nature, the want for escape— but it's as if he feels he's in a "coffin", trapped, never getting out.
I have to mention the sling— I love the hurt/comfort with poor hurt Shawn getting cared for by Juliet and Lassie, protected by them. It's so touching that they both took the time to figure this sling out, just to alleviate some of Shawn's pain; it speaks volumes of their characters and I'm not sure I can accurately put the "feeling" into words.
"Gash of light"— gah! Your imagery just kills me! :) In a good way, I mean. :) Love it, love it!
GAHHH! I love, love, love that Juliet is unnerved by Lassiter's "overt compassion"/ "complete absence of derision in his voice" for Shawn: And that difference made it clear just how messed up Shawn really was. How thoroughly wrecked the balance of their little world was. If Carlton felt like he needed to treat Shawn with overt compassion, then things were truly bad. So, going back to the "Look Out" Universe, Shawn is this messed up because of the "accident"/ attempted murder— messed up physically and messed up emotionally, forgoing rest to stare outside, report facts as if he finds the right ones, he can find the man he got away and turn the key in the lock of the physical prison (the safe house) and the emotional one (his fears).
Juliet's intervening, and Shawn's trying to block her— physically and emotionally— just stuns me. He can't deal with all this, and she can't let him just be— they have to talk about this. GUHHHH. His reaction is so visceral, white knuckles, his fears translating into unwilling destruction following this brutal honesty— where, if this were any other day, fear would be dealt with with an easy smile or some inappropriate joking. To see Shawn so raw is shocking (heehee, I like it). I really love this visual of Shawn clutching the curtain against him like some kind of security blanket, then having Juliet back away as if the person she usually knows so well is now some kind of wild animal, possibly with rabies. (Good thing she knows what to do!) :) Love Take Charge! Juliet. (Loved too this image of "watery orange light flattening out the panels of Shawn's face"— your imagery, descriptions and writing style, every always so high quality and completely demanding of my undivided attention— all of it is so awesome and beautiful; you really know how to draw your reader in and then hook— then it's all over. Hooked for life! :) You are an amazing writer, highly and hugely talented.) *envious* Lol. :) I love how you use these stark or simple images, like "natural light" vs. "artificial dark", to tell your story, or even just to offer whispers from the background that these "characters" are still there— really adds another layer to the "Watch Dog". Shawn is playing that part, while he's getting watched over by these two detectives, as well as Vick on the outside, and then Shawn is also watched over by shadow while being inevitably touched by this light— something that, in this case, is not good for him because it yields exposure.
Wow, wow. So instead of trying to bring him away, she offers a peace offering, a seat by the window and a seat next to her. Lol, she must know what she's doing. ;)
Shawn confessed! Didn't see that coming. But that he did it because this time, there's no clues or a puzzle— it's just waiting, and Shawn can't wait.
The Lassie-Shawn moment was some kind of priceless; Lassie has never really believed that Shawn was "psychic"— they have an "understanding" almost, since the Chief does "believe" in Shawn. And Shawn, though he'd never admit it, knows that Lassiter is the one to go to when in trouble. The moment also seems like a puzzle— something that Shawn can "read" and therefore, obtain control. (Lol, I hope I didn't completely miss your meaning.) Have to mention the almost Shules and the touchy Jules! :) Nice touch.
Well, another Fab story from you! Thoroughly enjoyable, stunning and beautiful and real and bittersweet— such a pleasure to read. :) Thank you for sharing! Keep up the awesome! :)
Date: October 23, 2009 11:13 am Title: Watch Dog
HEEEE. I TOLD YOU IT WAS NOT WORTH ABANDONING. FWEEDLE!
*iz so happy that you posted it* ;_;
*just wishes she could have been more help*
BUT SKY WAS. THAT IS WHAT HIVE IS FOR. o/ YAY HIVE!
AND ZOOOOOOOOOMJ I LIKE THE BITS YOU ADDED. HAAAAA LASSIE AND SHAWN BONDED!
Date: September 07, 2009 3:40 pm Title: Look Out
How have I not reviewed this?! I know I've read it, I must have been suffering from some kind of temporary insanity where my brain told me I reviewed when I really didn't.
This is so perfectly perfect! Comforting Juliet, worried Lassy, sleepy groggy Shawn. I couldn't ask for anything more. Thank you, thank you for writing this. I will be back to read it again, I know.