Date: December 09, 2008 11:33 pm Title: Chapter 2
Loving it!! You're doing a great job with the characterizations and - not surprisingly! - the physical aspects of the scene.
This line killed me! “Dude, cardinal rule- guys don’t handle other guy’s fruit of the looms!” Then he tipped back his head with a smile. “Besides, chicks dig the commando look.”
Author's Response: LOL! Thank you! I can easily imagine them having a rule like that! XD
Date: November 29, 2008 1:41 pm Title: Chapter 2
“You aren’t barefoot Shawn- you’ve got knee-highs on!” Loved this sooo much! The fact that Shawn had to look down and then expound on the manliness of his knee-highs was totally squee worthy!
Too early for anything other than cotton blend, he pulled at the propylene shirt melded against his skin. Fashionably sporty it may be, the stretchy snap of the garment wrapped around him made him feel like a sweaty banana. Ummmm....I know I had something to say about this, but doggone if all my little fangirl neurons didn't fizzle out in a blaze of glory!
And Dude!!! The kayak scene - alsdkjfalkjdflaksdlf;jasd;f - scared ME!!! There'e something alive down there...gah!
“Kay’, quick break- we get some smoothies, maybe split a turducken, and then come back and hit this again?”
Without a word, Gus put the car in gear and tore from the lot. What a perfect ending to this chapter. Its so blasted perfect it HURTS!!! I can see it so vividly and it had me in stitches that popped and had to be replaced:)
Author's Response:
Wow, thank you so much! I actually made myself giggle with the sock affrontage lol! And I was so hoping someone would have a brain sizzle with the image of Shawn in a wetsuit! Seriously!! I mean SERIOUSLY!!!
And hooray for lake monsters!! I'm really excited for the next two postings- I can't wait to see what you think! You've given me a gigantic grin that can't be erased!
Date: November 29, 2008 1:38 am Title: Chapter 2
I love both plots! I can't wait to read what happens next!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I credit VampKira for the awesome Lassy/Juliet plot :D
[Report This]Date: November 28, 2008 6:35 pm Title: Chapter 2
Agh! I so meant to review this sooner, but my computer hates me and wouldn't let me.
I loved this episode! You wrote it so well that it actually felt like an episode of Psych! Which btw, new one in a few hours!!! And... lol... Gus and gas station bathrooms! I had a bad experiance one time with those... yuck! They skeev me. I cannot wait until I read the next chapter! Amazing job!
Author's Response: Thank you very very much! Gas station bathrooms of this type should be wiped from the earth! I too have encountered such travesties, and was about as appalled as Gus when forced to make use such wretched facilities lol!