INT-HENRY’S HOUSE. DAY.
YOUNG SHAWN enters the house. He opens a cabinet, a closet then stomps through the kitchen door. He peeks under the kitchen island. HENRY watches from the kitchen table, coffee cup and paper in hand.
HENRY: Hey, Shawn... (YOUNG SHAWN stops searching and pays attention to his Dad) What in the world do you think you’re doing?
YOUNG SHAWN: Hide and seek.
HENRY: I don’t think so.
YOUNG SHAWN: But you said we could.
HENRY: Not like that.
YOUNG SHAWN: But that’s how you play.
HENRY: Not in my house. Shawn, you can’t tail a suspect like that. Look how loud you are. Your perp is going to hear you coming from every turn. Those things smack every time you take a step. (HENRY points at YOUNG SHAWN’s flip flops) If you’re gonna wear them when you compete, you gotta-
YOUNG SHAWN: “Compete”?
HENRY: (HENRY stands from his chair and begins stepping quietly towards YOUNG SHAWN) On the balls of your feet. Balls of your feet. You take deliberate steps. You don’t know where he is. He shouldn’t get to know where you are. He’s invisible. You’re invisible. Now you’ve leveled the playing field.
YOUNG SHAWN: Can I go now?
HENRY: No, you’re gonna learn to do the little things right. For instance… (HENRY goes and crouches down in a corner) When you peer around a corner, I want you to stay down low cause you see they’re expecting you up here (He reaches a hand up above his head) at eye level. When you walk down a hall (He begins crawling on the floor), check the grains of the carpet. We just vacuumed, right? (YOUNG SHAWN nods) (HENRY stands) And never, ever again do I ever want to hear you slam a door when you can pull it closed.
YOUNG SHAWN: But we’re just playing.
HENRY: Well, play right, Shawn, or don’t play at all.
YOUNG SHAWN takes his flip flops off and begins walking towards a pantry.
HENRY: Shawn… (whispers) He’s (YOUNG GUS) not in here.
YOUNG SHAWN nods and begins creeping low to the kitchen door.
INT-POLICE DEPARTMENT. DAY.
Officers pass in front of the camera and only their legs visible. SHAWN, only his legs visible as well, slips out of the CHIEF’S office and follows the officers. SHAWN hides behind a pillar within hearing distance of LASSITER, whose back is to the camera. A small party of cops, a WOMAN #1 and JULIET is also with him.
LASSITER: I don’t need to tell you how vital it is that we maintain the utmost secret on this heist. The attorney general does not want his son’s wedding disrupted any more than it’s already been.
JULIET: Well, how will we explain our presence to the press?
LASSITER: We don’t. Just let ‘em stew.
JULIE: Well, that’s one approach, but if I may suggest...I once wrote a paper regarding press releases and such, and…
SHAWN peeks his head out from behind the pillar in intrigue. LASSITER tilts his head at JULIET in mild disdain.
JULIET: Sorry. Your idea sounds great.
A door opens and closes in the background. LASSITER turns his head to it for a second.
LASSITER: Get the board.
LASSITER walks off with the cops, WOMAN #1 and JULIET. SHAWN peers his head around the pillar and GUS peers his head around the pillar from the other side.
GUS: What are you doing?
SHAWN: Dude, I’m on to something big.
GUS: Tailing cops? In a police station?
SHAWN: Some monumentally expensive ring just got stolen. I’m going to get us on the case.
GUS holds up a file.
GUS: We just got a case five minutes ago.
SHAWN: Yeah, a lame one. Stolen computers from a high school? Come on, like you weren’t falling asleep during that meeting.
Cops are moving a corkboard with various papers tacked to it. SHAWN zooms in on photographs of a lodge/hotel, wedding ring, family photo of three (a Mom, Dad and daughter), safe, two men (one has his face circled in red) and a bearded man in a suit.
SHAWN: This is an heirloom. It’s worth five million dollars. (GUS looks at the corkboard) Lifted from the hotel where they’re having the wedding. The wedding’s on Saturday. Ooh. Open bar. Dude, we’re so there.
GUS: Are we looking at the same thing?
The corkboard is removed. The CHIEF approaches in its wake, rolls her eyes and begins talking to SHAWN and GUS, who are both off camera.
CHIEF (annoyed): I told you to wait in my office.
SHAWN: I had a premonition. Something sparkly. Just over five carats, perfect clarity, (GUS and the CHIEF share a look) slight inclusion. Is this ringing any bells for you?
The CHIEF takes the file out of GUS’ arms and sets it in SHAWN’S hands.
CHIEF: Solve the case I gave you, then we’ll talk. In the meantime (She begins walking away and SHAWN begins flipping through the file), I have a lot of work to complete.
SHAWN: It’s the secretary.
The CHIEF turns around.
SHAWN closes the file and holds it out to the CHIEF.
SHAWN: The secretary. The secretary did it. Now (The CHIEF walks back to SHAWN and takes the file), what can you tell about the ring I’m envisioning?
CHIEF: But you barely even looked at this folder (She opens it).
SHAWN (a little antsy/bored): It’s in the papers.
CHIEF: Where? (She’s flipping through the file)
SHAWN: The signatures. It’s in her handwriting. (GUS is glancing between the file and SHAWN) Look she’s faking her own signature, and later there’s evidence- (GUS jabs SHAWN in the arm with his elbow, realizing that SHAWN might expose himself as not being psychic)
SHAWN flicks his hand in front of the CHIEF’S face and then grips his elbow to get it to stop, as if his hand has a mind of its own. His hand lands in the pillar. It’s obvious he caught on to what GUS was trying to communicate. GUS nudges SHAWN.
SHAWN: I feel it...in the ink (He gestures to the file). Very bad vibes. Strong…
CHIEF: We’ll check it out. Until then, I trust you can find the door. (She gestures off camera, towards the door and begins walking away)
SHAWN: Well, what about the ring?
CHIEF: Not until this one (She holds up the file) is done (She enters her office).
GUS begins to walk away. SHAWN stops him.
SHAWN: Hey. Let me gather some information, alright? Make a little headway, then I’ll have a psychic episode that blows the ears (He points to his ears then away from them) right off their skulls.
GUS: Shawn, I’m in meetings all day. I barely had time to come down here for this. We’re doing what the Chief says. Period. (He slaps SHAWN lightly on the arm then walks away)
SHAWN’S dumbfounded for a moment before he heads over to an archway and down stairs. Then he appears in the interrogation room doorway. He peeks through the doors window, opens the door and enters. WOMAN #2 and a MAN is there. WOMAN #2 is sitting at a table while the MAN stands next to her. The corkboard seen earlier is behind them.
SHAWN: So sorry to have kept you waiting. (WOMAN #2, MAN and WOMAN #3 look up at him) (SHAWN closes the door, peeks through the window to make sure no one’s watching and then walks over to the threesome) I’m Shawn Spencer, (He shakes WOMAN #2’S hand) Chief psychic here at the Department.
WOMAN #2: Thank you so much for helping. (SHAWN shakes the MAN’S hand) This whole thing has been devastating.
MAN (laughs a little): Um, my hands are still shaking.
WOMAN #2: You’re doing fine.
SHAWN: Okay, I only have a second. I’ll need you to tell me everything I have to know about this case as quickly as humanly possible, okay?
SHAWN zooms in on a photo of two men he saw earlier, where one man’s face is circled in red. He goes to the corkboard and circles the man’s encircled face with his finger.
SHAWN: What about this guy? What’s going on with the best man?
MAN: I don’t know. He’s not answering his phone or his door. This day has just been completely unreal-
SHAWN: Guys, it’s going to be fine. (WOMAN #3 takes her glasses off) I’ve never failed a case
WOMAN #3: I know who you are. I read about you in the paper.
SHAWN zooms in on a document in WOMAN #3’S hands.
SHAWN: You did? (He crosses over to where WOMAN #3 sits) You’re the sister of the groom. (WOMAN #3 tries to appear modest as SHAWN extends his hand for a shake. He zooms in on multiple photographs and documents) And the maid of honor. And the wedding planner?
WOMAN #3: Correct.
SHAWN: That is so many hats.
WOMAN #3: You should see my closet.
SHAWN: I’m hoping to...but not until I find this ring.
WOMAN #3: Well, the wedding’s tomorrow. How fast are you?
SHAWN: That depends entirely on how much cooperation I receive.
WOMAN #2: Why don’t you come to the wedding?
SHAWN: Yeah. No! No, I couldn’t impossibly impose on you, no.
WOMAN #2: Please. You’re saving us here. You find this ring, we’d owe you everything.
The interrogation room door opens. LASSITER and JULIET walk in, LASSITER none to pleased but smiling.
LASSITER: What the hell is going on here?
SHAWN: Eh, I just dropped by to say hello. Guys, (SHAWN gestures from WOMAN #2, MAN and WOMAN #3) this is Head Detective Carlton Lassiter (He gestures to LASSITER) and his lovely new partner, Juliet (He gestures to JULIET). His last one turned out to be his girlfriend, so she was transferred. I’m not sure if that was the only reason. (LASSITER has begun to approach SHAWN) I’ll let you decide for yourselves.
LASSITER puts an arm around SHAWN.
LASSITER: Shall we?
LASSITER guides SHAWN out of the room. WOMAN #2 and MAN share a look while WOMAN #3 smiles a little.
SHAWN: If this is some sort of hazing ritual where we’re going to end up naked in a river somewhere, I’ll need to arrange for a ride home.
LASSITER pushes SHAWN up against a pillar.
LASSITER: Listen to me, Spencer. The Department’s reputation is on the line with this one. If I catch you anywhere near this case, I will throw every book I can find at you.
SHAWN: What if you find the Bible? You going to throw that, too? Seems a little sacrilegious to me, don’t you think?
LASSITER clenched his jaw and walks away. SHAWN clutches the shoulder that hit the pillar.
SHAWN walks away.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Chapter Notes:
This is a Psych transcript for episode 1.03 “Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Piece.” When Shawn notices something, I’ll say he “zooms in” or “narrows in” on a piece of evidence. Swear words will be replaced with dashes for each letter because I don’t swear and I don’t want to write swearing. Each chapter will be uploaded in correspondence to commercial breaks. Also, the dialogue is 95% based off subtitles. The other 5% is when I hear a word that’s not included in the subtitles. And lastly, I don’t own the summary, it was taken from amazon prime video. Please enjoy!